How to Handle Election Stress (Or Any Stress)

One of the topics I've been talking about with clients and in my live seminars is the power of focus.

If we are not consciously choosing, in every moment, where we are directing our attention in life, our brain will just revert to what it has been programmed to do for two million years... look for something to be afraid of. 

Race car drivers are taught during their training if they lose control of a vehicle and find themselves headed towards a wall at 100 MPH, they must be able to immediately redirect their focus to where they want to steer the car (aka: NOT THE WALL). If they can't, a crash is inevitable.

Unfortunately, 99.9% of the world unconsciously focuses on "the wall" during times of stress, which is what we are seeing play out in a very real way during the American Presidential election. 

Think about it, how many uplifting ads have you seen (in any political race) where a candidate lays out a specific, aspirational, and inspirational plan to change our country for the better?

We don't see them because it's more effective to produce a commercial focusing on the terrible things that could happen to your family if the other candidate gets elected. The politicians know that most people are motivated to simply avoid pain rather than seek pleasure.

So when we allow ourselves to live in a fear based mindset, we perpetuate the problem and give more power to the negative emotions we are scared of. The result can often be the hatred, name calling, and acts of violence we see at rallies.

But I believe if you are reading this blog, you are in the other 0.1% of the world who wants to live an extraordinary life. 

For us to do this, we must raise our emotional intelligence. Here are 3 suggestions:

1) Realize negative emotions are simply a call for awareness. When you find yourself feeling afraid, hateful, or depressed (regardless whether it's about the election or your life), give yourself 90 seconds to feel the emotion fully.

Don't push it down. Don't numb out with food, booze, or social media. Sit quietly with your eyes closed and just observe the feeling. Let it move through you. 

Then simply ask yourself what is REALLY being triggered. Does watching the election coverage make you feel powerless? Well then in what other areas of your life do you feel powerless to make a change? In fact, when was the first time in your life where you felt that way? 

Typically, the trigger is a signal that there is a deeper wound that needs to be healed.

2) Find a new, empowering meaning to your story. I'm consistently amazed by the transformations that take place when my clients take seemingly terrible tragedies but assign a new meaning to the experience. I've seen people overcome awful things like sexual abuse and the loss of a child.

I'm inspired by the work of Elie Wiesel, a Holocaust survivor who took his experience as a prisoner at Auschwitz and used it to become a messenger for peace, atonement. and human dignity to all of mankind. 

If he could thrive after hearing his father be beaten death in a Nazi camp, then you and I can move forward in our lives too.

3) Take action. If you find an empowering meaning to the events in your life, you can take inspired action. People who see themselves as powerless victims will wallow in sadness, stay in bed, and hide from the world. Someone who feels determined, focused, and committed will be actively seeking solutions rather than focusing on problems.

But how you feel and react will be determined by the meaning you assign to the events in your life.

So what meaning can we assign to this election? What if all of this circus was actually a call for love? What if it was a call for us to realize that the REAL power to create positive change in our community begins with us? 

What action would you take? How would you treat the people who disagree with you differently? Would you listen more? Would you begin to look for common ground? Would you focus on solutions or simply continue to complain about the problems?

The media will continue to focus on the nonsensical train wreck. You and I can choose differently.

Let's rise together.