"I can't quit the job I hate, Dan. I have a family to support."
As a coach, I hear a variety of stories from clients as to why they can't leave a soul-sucking career and do the work which will bring them fulfillment. However, supporting the family always seems to be at the top of the list, even if it means a client must abandon themselves in the process.
I once worked with a successful executive who insisted that although he was burned out in his career, he had to give his family a better quality of life than he had growing up. He explained this to me as he took out a pill box with no less than FIVE prescriptions for things ranging from high blood pressure, to high cholesterol, to an irregular heartbeat.
Some quality of life, huh?
Sure, he was able to take the family on a nice vacation for two weeks every summer. College educations were paid for. And he loved showering his wife with nice gifts.
But the presents couldn't substitute for his lack of presence.
The other 50 weeks of the year, he was physically spent from the nonstop travel and emotionally exhausted from years of working for a company whose values were out of alignment with his own. He was overweight, unhealthy, and felt like a "sell-out." His job forced him to miss important events like birthdays, anniversaries,andlittle league games. He wanted to spend more time with his family, but was too worried about maintaining their lifestyle to make a change.
His breakthrough happened the day he dropped his oldest son off for his freshman year of college. Through tears, his son told him he appreciated how hard he worked to give him a good life, but he was terrified his dad wouldn't be alive to see him graduate. My client was shocked.
Here's the truth. The greatest gift you can give your family is your health and happiness. And the best way to create more happiness in your life to discover your purpose and bring it to life.
When you are aligned with your purpose, you wake up with passion and excitement, rather than dreading another uninspired day on the corporate hamster wheel. You become a person who finds deep fulfillment in knowing you are giving your best to the world each day, rather than focusing on what you can get. You have the energy to show up as a better parent, spouse, employee, and friend because you are taking care of you and operating on a full gas tank rather than constantly coasting on fumes.
If you are serious about getting to the next level in life, you must stop hiding behind your family as an excuse to play small and understand one thing.
The best way to take care of the people around you is to live your life as an example of what is possible.
Your kids are more inspired by your ACTIONS than your words.
Do you want to raise a child who earns an abundant living by using their gifts in service of others? Then you must become the role model who shows them how to do that.
To do this, you will be required to go deep and heal the old fear-based programming from your childhood. You will have to identify the hidden blocks which have made you believe you're unworthy of the life you desire. You have to examine the root cause of your scarcity mindset which made you believe there isn't enough love, opportunity, or wealth for you.
You might be thinking "I don't know what those are." Of course you don't! That's why the blocks are hidden. You need the perspective of a mentor or coach who has done the work and can identify your blind spots.
The work will probably feel uncomfortable. It will stretch you to grow and become more. However, facing those fears becomes the passport to ultimately arrive at your purpose. As you heal your patterns and make your purpose real on earth, you will be an example for family, friends, and loved ones to do the same.
My great wish for you is to stop focusing on what's in front of you and start thinking about what is really important. The greatest tragedy you can face one day is knowing you lived a life with an unanswered call.
If you are still reading this, I believe you know there is an untapped greatness within you that is crying to come forward. Don't delay it another year, month, or even another minute. Stop waiting until the kids are out of the house or until the bills are paid off. Stop thinking of the "5-year plan" and find someone who can help you remove your roadblocks and accelerate your growth.
There are so many people in your life ready to be inspired by your example.
As always, I'm right here supporting you along your path.