Thanksgiving Is a Great Time To Enjoy Turkey With Your Family... And To Find Yourself Being Tested.
I love my family and think they are wonderful people. However, no matter how many times I explain why I started my business, or how many glowing client testimonials they see on my website, they still aren't sure why I wouldn't just give up the uncertain world of entrepreneurship and go back to the steady paycheck of corporate America.
So it wasn't a shock that after I excitedly explained my plan to market my business and serve more people in 2017, my stepmother took a sip of wine and reminded me that Obamacare will be repealed and that I "need a job with health benefits." With that, she urged me to go apply for a job at Starbucks.
(Insert facepalm emoji here.)
We've all been there, working towards the incredible vision we hold for our life, only to hear the loud chatter from the doubters. They tell us why things won't work, why now is a bad time to take action, and urge us to find "Plan B."
And it can feel especially frustrating when those voices are the people we love most in our life.
So here are three quick strategies to help you cope with any uncomfortable conversations around the Thanksgiving dinner table:
1) Know the difference between doubters and haters.
Haters love to verbally abuse people and tear them apart in order to feel better about themselves.
As the old saying goes, there are two ways to build the tallest skyscraper in the city. You can go build a huge skyscraper on your own... or blow up all of the others in town.
For haters, they will always take the second option because it's the easiest.They prey on the insecurities of others to get attention. Why? Because generally speaking, their needs aren't being met and they are projecting it onto you.
If there is a hater in your life, it's best to eliminate their negative energy and cut them out of the picture. They will only bring you down.
On the other hand, doubters are usually coming from a place of love. Deep down, they are trying to protect you from experiencing pain. In the case of my stepmom, she's never told me my business goals are stupid or unachievable, she just thinks they are lofty. By the way, she isn't necessarily wrong about that. I'd prefer to aim high than to sell myself short.
By understanding that her intentions were to protect rather than to destroy, it enabled me to respond to her in a way that is loving and respectful, rather than angry and defensive. But that requires me to be confident in my second point...
2) Are the doubters simply a reflection your own uncertainty?
Other people's skepticism about your goals can only trigger you if you agree with them on some level..
One of the biggest game changing thoughts in the personal growth world is that what we believe we are experiencing in the outside world is typically a reflection of our internal thoughts.
So although her master plan for me to become a barista was certainly an annoyance, it did motivate me to hit my meditation pillow and explore if there were some old, cobweb beliefs under the surface making me question my own ability to get to the next level.
Taking a minute to hit the reset button allowed me to make sure my intentions and beliefs were truly aligned. From there, I could move onto step three.
3. Continue to take bold action.
You can use the doubters as an excuse to give up, keep playing small, and live other people's vision for your life. Or you can use it as rocket fuel to propel you further towards your goals.
But none of it matters unless you take courageous action each and every day. Even small action steps will accumulate and add up to massive results over time.
"An inch of movement will bring you closer to your goals than a mile of intention."
-Dr Steve Maraboli
I hope this email serves you as you enter the always triggering holiday season.
Don't forget if you are looking for a coach to help you get aligned, eliminate self-sabotage, and create massive action to reach your goals faster, I have a program to help. Early bird pricing for my "Smash Your 2017" program ends at 11:59pm PST tomorrow night. Sign up today and get $500 in free bonuses to go along with this breakthrough coaching experience. (ENROLL HERE)